Essay Four Rough Draft

Crystal Ainardi
Bleck
English 101
Aug. 11th 2008

Women's bodies owned by the President?

As November approaches for the Presidential elections many women will want to pay close attention to who will be supporting their rights. Women have come a long way in the right to vote, it was not until the 1920s the Nineteenth Amendment was put in Constitution, which prohibits each of the states and the federal government from denying any citizen the right to vote because of that citizen's sex. In many ways from that day forward the rights of women took many steps forward to the equality of men. In Chapter Six and Eight of Un-Spun: Finding Facts in a World of Disinformation, authors Brooks Jackson and Kathleen Hall Jamieson talk about the rules to not getting spun by the misconception on the internet. One rule that really applies to the matter of a women’s body and her reproductive system and where the candidates stand is “Cross-Check Everything That Matters” (168) and “Weighing Evidence” (168). On Senator John McCain’s website under his issue’s tab, he has no tab that directly addresses women, but if anybody had watched the news the past month we know exactly how Mr. McCain feels about birth control pills, abortion, and the men's magic pill Viagra. It just takes investigating online and cross-checking to find all the evidence John McCain keeps hidden and even sometimes directly unanswered from the women voter’s.

The most alarming thing about John McCain is women often get swept up his savior attitude or as some call it the “maverick”, and truly don’t look into the facts. One really doesn’t have to look far on the internet to find the scoop on Mr. McCain. According to Planned Parenthood, one of the largest health care providers for reproductive health; when they polled “1,205 women in 16 likely battleground states, finding that despite his extreme voting record, 51 percent of women voters in battleground states have no idea what John McCain's positions are on women's reproductive health issues” (Planned Parenthood). Furthermore, of these women Planned Parenthood polled “Forty-nine percent of women currently backing McCain express pro-choice views” and, “46 percent of women supporting McCain over Obama want to see Roe v. Wade upheld.”(Planned Parenthood). This is the kind of information women voters would need to cross-check, if they truly knew John McCain they would know they were casting their vote for the guy who will not uphold their wants. Further investigating would give a voter more clear answers.

One might wonder if women voters have paid attention to all the news birth control and abortion has received lately, a lot of that news is giving a glimpse of what a future with John McCain may be. As of recently the Bush administration has pushed forward a proposal that would begin treating certain kinds of birth control pills as abortion. According to the Wall street Journal, “The Bush Administration has ignited a furor with a proposed definition of pregnancy that has the effect of classifying some of the most widely used methods of contraception as abortion.”(Simon). The article also said many Democrats, including Democratic Presidential nominee Barack Obama, have signed letters to oppose the proposal. John McCain had no comment. This seems to be his theme with the topic of reproductive issues. Last month John McCain was asked about his thoughts about health insurance companies covering Viagra but not Birth Control Pills. And, according to The New York times, “The normally voluble Senator John McCain found himself at a loss for words Wednesday when he was asked aboard his campaign bus on its way to Portsmouth, Ohio, whether he thought it was fair that some health insurance companies covered Viagra but not birth control. ‘I don't usually duck an issue,’ he said, ‘but I'll try to get back to you.’”(Cooper). Again, John McCain left women voters with empty answers on where their future would be in his hands if he was the commander-in-chief. This promoted anger from Naral Pro-Choice America who noted that “Mr. McCain had voted against a 2005 bill requiring health insurance companies to cover birth-control pills as well as Viagra. Mr. McCain said he did not recall the vote.”(Cooper).

If a woman voter truly wanted to know where John McCain stood on reproductive rights some of the answers are spelled out on his website. Under his issue’s tab there is no link given directly to Women, like his opponent Obama has, but there is one called “Human Dignity and Life” (JohnMcCain.com). At the very top in bright blue colors it states Overturning Roe vs. Wade. According to the website John McCain believes that “Roe v. Wade is a flawed decision that must be overturned, and as president he will nominate judges who understand that courts should not be in the business of legislating from the bench.”(JohnMcCain.com). If you go over the whole list with a fine comb there in no mention of birth control pills, so again women are let unanswered with the facts on that one.

On defense of John McCain the one option he brings up on his web-page to help women in crisis is the promotion of adoption for unwanted pregnancies. He shares his own personal story of him and his Wife Cindy McCain adopting a child. As stated on the website, “As president, motivated by his personal experience, John McCain will seek ways to promote adoption as a first option for women struggling with a crisis pregnancy. In the past, he cosponsored legislation to prohibit discrimination against families with adopted children, to provide adoption education, and to permit tax deductions for qualified adoption expenses, as well as to remove barriers to interracial and inter-ethnic adoptions”(JohnMcCain.com).

Yet, this doesn’t seem enough. John McCain mentions nothing of the current high rise of pregnancy’s across the nation. His only options for them that he spells out on his page is adoption or helping her bring the baby into the world. As he says on his site; “However, the reversal of Roe v. Wade represents only one step in the long path toward ending abortion. Once the question is returned to the states, the fight for life will be one of courage and compassion - the courage of a pregnant mother to bring her child into the world and the compassion of civil society to meet her needs and those of her newborn baby” (JohnMcCain.com) Nothing is noted on his website about prevention, sexual education, or access to birth control pills, and he absolutely will overturn the option of abortion.

In reality John McCain avoids questions on the topic of women’s reproductive, leaving women voters with real no hard facts to go on. He has consigned the Bush administrations policy of abstinence and no sexual education. John McCain is so opposed to contraception the one thing that can avoid the rising pregnancies in the nation; that he voted against having insurance plans to cover it and rarely does he even remember how he voted. This does not show the American women he really cares about their rights. If John McCain was voted in as President women’s rights would rush back to the time before 1973 when abortion first became legal and birth control pills became more accessible. If women’s reproductive rights are pushed back thirty-five years it will only “drive them into back alleys where they became dangerous, expensive, and humiliating. Thousands of American women died and thousands more were maimed before abortion was legal. For this reason and others, women and men fought for and achieved women's legal right to make their own decisions about abortion.” (Planned Parenthood). American women voters truly need to read into the facts they are fed on the internet and TV and with just a little cross-checking they could find where John McCain stands on some of these vital issues that purposely he still leaves a lot unclear.

Cooper, Michael. "Sex, Drugs and Insurance :[National Desk]. " New York Times [New York, N.Y.] 10 Jul 2008, Late Edition (East Coast): A.19. ProQuest National Newspapers Core. ProQuest. 7 Aug. 2008 http://www.proquest.com/

Jackson Brooks, Kathleen Hall Jamieson. Un-Spun: Finding Facts in a World of Disinformation. New York: Random House, Inc. 2007.

McCain, John. August 9, 2008 “Human Dignity and Life” John McCain.com http://www.johnmccain.com/

Planned Parenthood. “Know John McCain” Planned Parenthood © 2008 Planned Parenthood® Action Fund, Inc. 9 Aug 2008 http://www.plannedparenthoodaction.org/campaigns/know-john-mccain-122.ht...

Simon, Stephanie. "Currents: Treating the Pill as Abortion, Draft Regulation Stirs Debate. " Wall Street Journal [New York, N.Y.] 31 Jul 2008, Eastern edition: A.11. ProQuest National Newspapers Core. ProQuest. 7 Aug. 2008

to crystal

The introduction works as far as it goes, but it ends more with a statement of fact, that it takes time to ferret out certain bits of information. But when one does ferret out that information, what will they learn, how should they view it? That's the question the thesis needs to address in order to deliver a clearly argumentative claim to the reader. Based on the conclusion it would seem that he is a clone of the Bush perspective, for lack of a better way to put it. Though I wouldn't use this in the thesis because it's overly biased, this is the sort of thing that leads some detractors to call him "McSame."

The use of argument format works well. I think that each of the points can benefit from further explanation and a clearer thesis up front should make this a bit easier by creating the context for that explanation. Basically, it seems that there is some benefit to McCain by being unclear. Spell out why, after each paragraph in support of the argument, that this is, or ought to be, or whatever, a concern for women who themselves consider reproductive rights fundamental to their choice when casting a presidential ballot.

I was glad to see you got the birth control as abortion point in the essay as I read about this for the first time yesterday. It's good to be on top of the topic in this way.

One thing you might consider addressing in greater detail is the McCain's adoption of their foreign born child. I don't recall where she is from, India, Pakistan, Nepal or some place in that region. The child was born with a cleft palate, which is why she was available for adoption. This child wasn't "unwanted" until the birth defect was discovered. There's really only a tangential relationship between his adoption and the birth control/abortion issue that one could say he is exploiting, using his daughter as a prop. Interestingly, in 2000, this child was held up as evidence in a most likely Karl Rove, working for George Bush, engineered smear of McCain as being his bi-racial "love child." She's now 16 and I don't know much about her current life, though I have to imagine she is well cared for and well loved.

Bradley

response

intro: I think maybe some of those things could be kept for the topics or involved in your paragraphs

thesis: I agree that your thesis needs work and I also know that it is the number one thing we're all screwing up on (include me in that 100%). I think I may have gotten at least my thesis right this time so maybe this will help. In plain English it should be a statement that makes me possibly want to argue with it if my view opposes that. ie.
"Roe vs. Wade" got it wrong when they cleared the way for women to choose whether or not to terminate their pregnancies"

See what I mean? If you are pro-choice than that might fire ya up into a rebuttal OR it may draw you in because you're in complete agreement.

I hope that helps. I need help on my works cited that's for sure but yours looks great!

One more thing (sorry). in your first paragraph when you compare him as having a "savior" or "maverick" I think you may be thinking the wrong thing (i think correct me if I'm wrong)

So you think of "savior" as a hero, saint, helper. "Maverick" should make you think about the movie "Top Gun". You know hot-headed, stubborn, fly off the handle, pain in the a$%

You should look at some youtube videos of mccain getting pissed off, it's pretty funny!

Mary B

Hi Crystal

Introduction: Very good Intro, automatically I was interested in your essay and wanted to read more-maybe because I'm a girl. Good title by the way too. (I seem to have trouble deciding on titles, thesis' and work cites, just those things lol)

Essay Focus, Thesis or Main : Your Intro is great but I feel like you could do something more with your thesis. It just seems part of the intro. I think you might want to re-word it a bit, "It just takes.." seems like your starting in the middle of another sentence or something. Maybe say: McCain is purposely hiding directly unanswered questions regarding women's rights. Or something like that.

Development of Ideas and/or Experiences: Good job, each paragraph leads to the next one very well. You discuss each paragraph topic completely.

Organization, structure and/or paragraphing Effective :Like I said earlier, well organized with each paragraph discussed thoroughly. :)

Wording, Sentence Structure and Conventions of Standard American English: I didn't see any miss-spellings, and it looks like your cites are good, BUT I still don't have the hang of the work cite thing SO don't take my word on that.

Adequacy of response to assignment: Yes. You made good points that ARE important issues that need to be acknowledged.

Appropriateness of topic: Yep, good job!

thanks

I am going to go work on my thesis again too. I always have a hard time nailing them!

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