Essay 4 Draft

Kelly Koelle
Bradley Bleck
English 101
August 11, 2008
Resist the Winds of Change
Each day, new information becomes available to the public pertaining to Election 2008. McCain and his supporters are slamming Obama, Obama and his supporters are slamming McCain. The whole scenario can turn into a he said, she said ordeal, with no real clear picture that points the way to a logical vote. With so much swirling information surrounding us, a person can become bewildered as to what information they can rely on. In the book, Unspun: Finding Facts In a World of [Disinformation], Brooks Jackson and Kathleen Hall Jamieson, the reader is taken on a journey through the misrepresentation that occurs around us and the steps to walk out of the deception so that we are operating on a more factual information level. In the concluding chapters of the book, we are given this piece of advice that can assist our decision making when we receive continuous information overload, “By now it should be obvious that relying on a single source of information is a good way to be steered wrong” (Jackson 168). With that piece of advice, we can take a look at the political landscape each day, and work at sorting the onslaught of information. If a person analyzes Obama’s premise of change, it soon becomes evident, that with a Democratic Congress in place, this so called “change,” may not be change at all. If people are relying solely on television advertisements, or ‘slamcains’, a word made up to describe the negative campaign ads each candidate makes, or the media coverage surrounding what the particular candidate is doing, they will be neglecting the weightier matters of discernment when it comes to choosing a new President. That being said, it would be an injustice to the American people to be taken in by a false notion that Obama as president will transform and change America. Democrats are already controlling Congress and with that control they are making laws and passing legislation that has a big imprint on the current state of the union, so if a person is seeking change, or more of the same, neither candidate is going to fill that bill.
When the founding father’s created the Constitution of the United States, they created it to have a system of checks and balances. They had the wisdom to foresee that if any particular branch retained to much power, there would be a loss of balance in the government and could lead to disunity in the nation. Charles W. Johnson provides a detailed explanation of the law making process in a publication titled, How Laws Are Made. It is an elaborate system for introduction of legislation, its journey through both houses of the Legislative branch and then a final stamp or denial of approval by the Executive branch. “Article I, Section 1, of the United States Constitution, provides that: ‘All legislative Powers herein granted shall be vested in a Congress of the United States, which shall consist of a Senate and House of Representatives’” (Johnson 1). Most legislation originates in the House of Representatives, but has to receive approval of both the House and Senate in order to become a law, however, there is one more step in the process, it has to be sent to the President, who can either sign it into law, by approving it or returning it to the Senate with objections, or veto, in which case the Senate can override the presidential veto by a two-thirds vote in each House (Johnson). This is a very simplified version of the entire process, but the information is provided to show the reader the extent to which the Congress and President have an influence on what legislation is passed. When a Congress is controlled by one party, like it currently is controlled by the Democrats, and the Executive branch is controlled by the opposing party, the Republicans, it provides a better balance than when one party controls both branches of the government. Any time anything becomes to one sided, it becomes polarized and there is no balance in it anymore. That is a fearful thing to consider when it pertains to our national government. A person does not get this information from the media ads that are selling this candidate or that candidate that is why it is crucial to rely on more than one source for important information.
There is so much negative criticism of George Bush, however, for the past two years, the Democrats have been controlling Congress and they are the responsible party for making the laws. President Bush only has the power to approve or disapprove their legislation. Therefore, if the American people want “change,” they need to do more than put Obama into office. Obama will not change the Democratic Congress that has been running the country for the past two years, he will only add to it’s already out of control policies and legislation, since after all he is also a Democrat and having a Democratic President hand in hand with a Democratic Congress will be more of the same policies that have been passed since this Democratic Congress came into office. George Orchenski, summed it up this way in his article “Betrayed by Dems,”
“This is a shameful legacy for the Democrats, who promised us change, then gave us more domestic spying and war. Their betrayal may well backfire, however. Americans are hard pressed right now and looking for relief. But if this is what Democrats call “change,” why would we ever want to vote for more?” (Orchenski).
To the average American, the reality that the Democrats are really in control, is not readily known. Even Democrats, don’t seem to view it from that perspective. But that is the truth of the matter and without understanding that part of how the United States government works, it is easy to be misled to believe in a false idea, leading a person to vote for Obama, based on false hope of change.
The approval rating for President Bush is poor however, the approval rating for the Democratic Congress is nearly as poor. McCain and Obama are up against the odds in what they can accomplish for the nation if elected President. In reference to Campaign ’08, Michael Finnegan and Noam N. Levey, made these statements if McCain is elected president,
“the Democrats who run Congress left no doubt Tuesday that they would marshal their power over the House and Senate to torment McCain and promote their party’s probable White House nominee, Barack Obama” (Finnegan).
Democrats are in control of the flow of legislation on Capitol Hill and that makes it extremely difficult for any Republican President to succeed in office. On the other hand, because of the poor perception of the current Congress, Obama has his work cut out for him to convince the American public that he can actually effect change in Washington.
“Obama must keep in mind the public’s poor opinion of Congress. Whereas voters may see him as ‘fresh, new and different,’ said GOP strategist Don Sipple, they view congressional leaders a ‘stale, old and inept.’ ‘He’s going to have to show he can work with them and achieve results, but be under no illusion that these people are at all popular,’ Sipple said” (Finnegan).
In the meantime, there is conflict between the two branches of government. There is also unrest in the society. People want real change. People want change in the form of an end to their hard problems. As Siobhan Hughes, and Ian Talley write in the Wall Street Journal, “the general public is becoming frustrated and impatient with purported legislative solutions that only nibble around the edges, or which are guaranteed to fail. Congressional Democrats may be willing to wait for the next six months. Americans who dread pulling into the gas station every day want relief as soon as possible from the heavy burden of high gas prices. They have every right to expect their representatives in Washington to do something now” (Hughes). Obama may claim to represent change, but the change he represents is not going to be delivered soon enough for most people. If people truly stop to consider the facts, the Democrats are actually standing in the way of change since they are in control of the Congress.
It has been revealed that Obama has charisma, and charm that draws people out who may otherwise be uninvolved, for example he is drawing in people from a younger base of voters than has been seen. He has proposed plans to deal with the economy, however these proposals have been attacked by the Republicans through their candidate advertisements of McCain. When the negative ads against him are checked out at factcheck .org, some of the unappealing accusations are dismantled, revealing a more appealing candidate. McCain accuses Obama that his vote will raise taxes, at factcheck.org, the truth is revealed that Obama’s plan will cut taxes on most Americans as well as cutting taxes on seniors who make $50,000 or less. Obama’s plan also provides a simplification of the tax filing for middle class Americans. These are all things most Americans would like to see accomplished. The question is, can Obama or any person elected really bring about change.
Since Bush has been in office, he has created laws that have increased the powers of the executive branch of government. As a result, the next president will inherit powers much expanded since the 2001 attacks. This has led to serious debates over the activities that have occurred under the new laws. Specifically in reference to what type of treatment should be utilized when dealing with terror suspects and the obtaining of information from them. McCain and Obama are in two different camps when it comes to how they view that item. “Debates about the extent of presidential constitutional powers are as old as the republic itself”, the McCain campaign said. Obama on the other hand feels that it is an abuse of power for a president to use signing statements to undermine legislation passed by Congress. James Risen admonishes us that “Ultimately, advocates for both candidates recognize that the issues surrounding presidential power are so complex, so vexing and so tempting that the choice between the two men on the issue of executive authority come down to matters of style temperament and personal judgment. In the end, events will dictate how they respond” (Risen). Just as the issues surrounding presidential power are complex and vexing, so are the problems facing the next president. Without a more cohesive direction within the country, neither Obama, nor McCain will be able to affect any change unless they are supported by the people. It is time for Americans to go back to their roots, of where the founding fathers intended the country to operate from, remove the special interest, remove the depravity, uphold more honorable standards for themselves and provide an example to the people that they can respect and want to follow. When rulers are unjust, the people suffer. At this point it is a double edged sword for each candidate. Both candidates are up against what their predecessors created. It is a double edged sword for voters, because without balance in the government, we will not be voting in change.

Works Cited Essay 4

Finnegan, Michael, Levey, Noam N.. "CAMPAIGN '08: Capitol Hill; Congress rallies
around Obama; Because Democrats run the show, they can help push the agenda
of the party's probable presidential nominee. " Los Angeles Times [Los Angeles, Calif.] 11 Jun 2008,A.10. Los Angeles Times. ProQuest. 10 Aug.
2008

Harwood, John. "A Hug for Obama, A Handshake for McCain :[National Desk]. " New
York Times [New York, N.Y.] 28 Jul 2008, Late Edition (East Coast): A.14. ProQuest National Newspapers Core. ProQuest. 10 Aug. 2008

Hughes, Siobhan, Talley, Ian. "U.S. News: Democrats and GOP Battle Over Oil
Exploration. " Wall Street Journal [New York, N.Y.] 18 Jul 2008, Eastern
edition: A.3. ProQuest National Newspapers Core. ProQuest. 10 Aug.
2008

Jackson, Brooks, and Jamieson, Kathleen Hall. UnSpun: Finding Facts in a World of
[Disinformation]. New York: Random House Trade Paperbacks, 2007
Johnson, Charles W. How Our Laws Are Made. Washington, D.C. 20 June 2003.
U.S. Government Printing Office.
"Obama's Dry Hole. " Wall Street Journal [New York, N.Y.] 30 Jun 2008, Eastern
edition: A.12. ProQuest National Newspapers Core. ProQuest. 10 Aug.
2008

Ochenski, Helena George. "Betrayed by Dems. " Missoula Independent [Missoula,
Mont.] 26 Jun 2008,10. Alt-Press Watch (APW). ProQuest. 10 Aug.
2008

Risen, James. "The Executive Power Awaiting the Next President :[Week in Review
Desk]. " New York Times [New York, N.Y.] 22 Jun 2008, Late Edition (East Coast): WK.4. ProQuest National Newspapers Core. ProQuest. 10 Aug. 2008

to kelly

I like the title. I haven't read the essay yet, but it leads me to expect an argument against Obama in some way, and a good title creates that sort of an expectation. In some ways it's a cliche, but that is probably why it works in this instance. Readers know the phrase and in the context of the election, it points straight to Obama.

In the introduction, don't forget to use full names and titles on the first mention of each candidate. When it comes to the thesis, you waffle a bit when saying that neither candidate is going to people to force much change, and you're right. But don't say that in the thesis. If the argument is about the limited change Obama could bring about if elected, don't bring McCain into the equation. Just say "hey, he promises change, but his job is to execute the laws, not make them, and it's the legislative branch that will really bring about the change (or not)." Of course, how one chooses to execute the laws (think of President Bush and his signing statements to this effect) and things get murkier, but that can be saved for the opposing view. One great historical example of this concerns Andrew Jackson and the forced migration of Indians and the Trail of Tears. The Supreme Court told him to stop, but he said something to the effect that "they have the law, but I have the army," a play on might makes right. Presidents have a good deal of latitude in how they execute the laws. This is meant as nothing more than food for thought.

With the body of the essay, there are a couple of concerns to address in the big picture. The first could be recent history, because Bill Clinton had at least a Democratic House, and maybe Senate (I can't recall) but he wasn't able to get a lot done, using health care as an example. When a party gains dominance, they tend to begin infighting and power grabbing (which is part of what led to the Republican losses two years back). This hindered Bush to some degree, and Clinton as well. It would likely hinder Obama should he win. I'm also not sure there is much legitimacy in blaming Democrats for not having fixed things in the past two years. That's an awful short time in historical and legislative terms, one budget cycle, and nothing much of substance can change in that short period of time.

With the "shameful legacy" quote, introduce and identify the person making the comment so the reader knows where and from whom it comes. This needs to happen with each of the quotes that lack such context. Similarly, having the majority and setting the agenda does not necessarily, in practical terms, mean they are in control. The whole reason for two houses, and the equal representation of the Senate, is to thwart the power of numbers. It's really the Constitution that limits the Democrats ability to ram legislation through, not ineptitude or Republican righteousness. We saw Democrats stonewall Republicans before the last election and it will continue long into the future no matter who is in charge.

I am unclear as to where the merits of the opposing view leaves off (and I'm taking this to be Obama's charisma) and where the refutation/rebuttal of that point begins. These should be in separate, fully developed paragraphs.

I like the way the essay makes an appeal for real change as it wraps up, but the sad fact, if it's even sad, is that candidates have been vilifying each other since at least the election of 1800 (and there was even quite a bit of subterfuge working against Washington when he was President and Commander-in-Chief during the war)where the nation nearly came to war, and if Adams was re-elected, they may have as Jefferson supporters were martialing men to fight. Anyway, character assassination is a long and storied part of our political history, for better or worse.

Another point to consider is the approval ratings. The big distinction is that why most everyone has a low opinion of Congress, they tend to approve of their representatives. It's always the "other" guy or gal who is the problem. This may or may not be something to take into consideration. The president's rating, on the other hand, is more clearly indicative of a broader perception. The point here is that the approval ratings, like Mark Twain says, can be misleading as "lies, damned lies, and statistics."

Bradley

Intro: It’s extremely

Intro: It’s extremely organized and as the reader I know where you’re headed in this essay.

Essay Focus: Your thesis is kind of strong, but you could give the reader a little more.

Development of Ideas and/or Experiences: your paragraphs, as the other comments suggests, will ever once in a while start to go off in a direction not full presented by the thesis. The paragraph could also be a tad more fluid.

Organization: The essay itself is wholly organized, but the paragraphs themselves are a little scattered.

Wording/ structure/conventions: Some sentences are a tad awkward and could use some rephrasing.

Adequacy of response to assignment: As the other comment mentioned there isn’t really an opposing idea paragraph. And the conclusion needs to tie in to your thesis more.

Appropriateness of topic: word choice was age appropriate as well as the content.

Thanks for helping me to

Thanks for helping me to focus on where I need to fix things.
Kelly

Introduction: Very good

Introduction: Very good Intro, you gave a clear idea of what you would be discussing. Good job.

Essay Focus, Thesis or Main : Thesis is pretty good.

Development of Ideas and/or Experiences: Ideas are good, you make good points but I think each paragraph needs to be a bit more clearer. Make each paragraph follow through with a topic.

Organization, structure and/or paragraphing Effective :Paragraphs need to be better organized . Polish it up a bit. I think you need to add more to the opposing side; the good things about McCain and Obama etc.

Wording, Sentence Structure and Conventions of Standard American English: I think you have some long sentences that could be split up but I couldn't spot any misspellings.

Adequacy of response to assignment: I think you need to add to your response to the topic.

Appropriateness of topic: Yes

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.